Concert Round-Up

Been really busy with end-of-Quarter work stuff, so just a quick rundown detailing three concerts from the past week.


Phoenix, The Wiltern, 9/21/06

Was really ready to get down and dance to this electropop meets indie rock band from Marseilles, France. Their album “It’s Never Been Like That” is right up there in my Top 5 from 2006 list, and they’re renowned for their high energy live performances. They were great the morning of, performing a live broadcast and streamed set in the KCRW studios with Nic Harcourt (click here for audio and/or video of the set). All I can really say is that they were pretty good, but not great. They moved through their old and new (but mostly new) material very solidly, but there were no real surprises. And even though we were right up in the front, there seemed to be some sort of energy lacking – both on stage and down in the crowd. Maybe it was that they went on at nearly 11pm on a weekday night, or maybe it was the fact that the theater was clearly undersold. Or maybe it’s just the curse of L.A.’s jaded crowds. Oh well.


Massive Attack / TV on the Radio, The Hollywood Bowl, 9/24/06


First of all, TV on the Radio was amazing. Lead singer Tunde Adebimpe is possibly one of the most exciting frontmen I’ve ever seen. His passion just oozes from the stage into the crowd, infecting all. I hope to have the opportunity one day to see these guys play in a small, intimate venue. I can only imagine something like that going off. For a hint of what I’m talking about, check out this recent performance from Letterman’s show – even Dave seems shocked by their energy.

Massive Attack: First of all, it could have been louder – the sound seemed drowned out and hollow at times (ie little to no bass). The lights were great, though – across the back of the stage was rigged a huge LED display that featured incredibly complex and beautiful patterns all night, which was necessary since the band played all night as dark silhouettes, never once showing their faces.

The music was solid, but I had one major complaint here: yes, MA are a downtempo group, but in a show like this, they could have layered in some beats to get people going. I kept looking back and everyone was super mellow. Maybe they were all just stoned or whatever, but there was a perceptible lack of energy in the crowd...and it was MA's fault. I kept thinking back to Bjork's show there a few years ago. Similar sound and lights and crowd, but she brought Matmos who in turn brought the fat beats and everyone went nuts. It felt at times like the music was a tease. Otherwise, I really enjoyed the show and grooves and all that until...

...they started scrolling anti-war/-West factoids across the LED display - eg # of dead in Iraq this year; cost of war so far. WTF! Same thing Flaming Lips did this summer at the bowl: blindside you at the very end with political bullshit. I don't want to think about Iraq while I'm at a summer concert at the Bowl! I just don't. Sorry Mr. Hollywood Reporter Smarty Pants: I got it, I just didn’t like it. Call me selfish, but that's not what I paid this group to see. To throw out one hour of lush grooves and trippy lights then slam you with casualty stats...well, it just took me out of my element. It was a cheap shot. I would never see these guys again.


Tom Petty / The Strokes, The Hollywood Bowl, 9/26/06

The Strokes kicked off the evening with an extended opening set and did a great job. The sound problems were clearly fixed from the other night, and they were punchy and ready to rock. They were everything The Shins were not when we saw them also in the opening slot at the Bowl earlier this summer. Vocalist Julian Casablancas can drone on at times and become somewhat monotonous, but the band behind him easily lifts the sound with creative drum, bass and guitar flourishes.

Petty: The guy has got the most ridiculous catalog of songs to pull from and he played many of his best hits - it was their “30th Anniversary Tour”, after all. He played a number of tunes from Full Moon Fever, a couple from Wildflowers, a couple from the new album "Highway Companion", the early-years classics, of course, and even a couple of covers - eg some old Bo Diddly number.

Stevie Nicks is apparently touring with him, so she came out also and sang a bunch of back-up and even full lead vocals on one tune. She was a great addition.

Petty was clearly excited to be home in L.A. after being on the road for a while. He was relaxed and joking a bunch, throwing out early on: “Man, I’ve got more ex-gfs backstage than you’ve ever had.”

He rocked the songs bigtime and the Heartbreakers sounded great. Sometimes he sang solo, sometimes with lots of back-up. The vocals were done right, always sounding lush and just full enough. He knows how to put on a show as good as he ever did, and is def claiming his role as a lasting godfather of rock. So much for the good stuff…

The crowd was fucking horrible. I don’t think I’ve ever in my life seen so much middle-aged white trash. It was like what I would imagine a NASCAR event to be: drunk white trash everywhere. They were pushing and hollering, squatting in people’s seats and generally being horribly obnoxious. Then you had the polite, older ex-hippie crowd, who were nice and fine and all but dead as doornails. Finally, there was the younger (ie under-40) folk like us, who were also fine and nice, but equally stiff. It was like being at a show with a bunch of raging lunatics, and a bunch of zombies.

There was a major fistfight two rows in front of us. Then there was guy directly in front of us who was so drunk he was belching in his date’s ear and groping her and sticking his tongue out at her, his behavior growing steadily worse until she finally tried pushing him away and he grabbed her and she pushed back HARD and he went flying into the aisle on his ass while she ran off into the darkness.

About the only good thing about the crowd was the singing. Big, mass on-key sing-a-longs at many points. That was fun. Otherwise, stick a needle in my eye.

Setlist:

Listen to Her Heart
Mary Jane's Last Dance
Won't Back Down
Free Falling
Saving Grace
I'm a Man
Oh Well
Handle With Care (w/Jeff Lynne of The Traveling Wilburys)
Stop Dragging My Heart Around (w/Stevie Nicks)
I Need to Know (Stevie singing lead)
Good to Be King
Down South
Insider (w/Stevie)
Learning to Fly
Don't Come Around Here No More
Refugee
Running Down a Dream

Encore:
You Wreck Me
Mystic Eyes
American Girl

From 'The Onion'...

'The Scream' Returns From Two-Year Vacation Relaxed

Apple iPhone

Looks like the rumors of Apple's entering the cell phone market are legit:

Apple iPhone to be Cingular-exclusive at launch

By Ryan Katz, Senior Editor

September 26, 2006 - Apple and Cingular have signed an agreement that will make the US' largest cell phone provider the exclusive carrier of Apple's forthcoming phone, sources report. Apple's iPhone remains on track for an early 2007 release.

As previously reported, Apple's phone will feature a candy-bar design with a 2.2-inch display and 3 megapixel camera. Robust iTunes and iSync support will also be delivered with the phone.

Apple's exclusive contract with Cingular is said to be good for the first six months, sources report, meaning other providers will be able to sell the phone in the second-half of 2007. Cingular had an exclusive on the Motorola ROKR—the first phone to feature iTunes—when it launched last year.

Sources say Apple is in talks with providers in other parts of the world on exclusive deals, but are short on specifics. O2 had the exclusive on the ROKR in Europe, however, suggesting that provider may again be tapped to launch Apple's phone.

Meanwhile, insiders say Apple is internally estimating that shipments of the iPhone will top a staggering 25 million in 2007 alone. Motorola's RAZR, by contrast, has sold more than 50 million units since its launch in late 2004. Apple is betting a phone with Apple's iconic design, elegant interface, and iPod-matching functionality will be a strong draw for users who currently carry both devices on them.

(Pic is artist's rendering only)

Their Lucky Charms Need Some Tinkering, Me Thinks…

Is a real-life leprechaun running around Mobile, Alabama scaring the bejesus out of some poor crackheads. Judge for yourself:

Quack-Quack!

10 Scientific Frauds that Rocked the World

Of Cheap Couture and Other Fitful Hankerings…

Promising to turn cheap fashion in L.A. on its head, H&M is set to open its first store here on Thursday in Pasadena (the Beverly Center one, an 18,000 sq. ft. monstrosity, is due Oct. 26).

The L.A. Times takes a look at what that means for your shopping experience…and for the H&M’s nervous competitors.

U.S. vs. Iran?

TIME Magazine’s cover story this week deals with the question of whether we are gearing up for a military engagement with Iran, and what shape that conflict – and its aftermath – would take:

On its face, of course, the notion of a war with Iran seems absurd. By any rational measure, the last thing the U.S. can afford is another war.…But superpowers don't always get to choose their enemies or the timing of their confrontations. The fact that all sides would risk losing so much in armed conflict doesn't mean they won't stumble into one anyway. And for all the good arguments against any war now, much less this one, there are just as many indications that a genuine, eyeball-to-eyeball crisis between the U.S. and Iran may be looming, and sooner than many realize.

Click here for the full, eye-opening article.

Liberalism vs. Religious Extremism

Sam Harris, author of a book that ripped religion as the greatest danger in modern society and favored instead the complete dominance of enlightened and secular liberalism, writes an Op-Ed piece in the LA Times this time chastising liberalism as the keenest danger to our civilization via its wholesale disregard of the violent danger originating from religious extremism. He argues that, strangely enough, it is the religious fanatics of the West who may prove to be our savior against the threat from radical Islamism:

Being generally reasonable and tolerant of diversity, liberals should be especially sensitive to the dangers of religious literalism. But they aren't....The people who speak most sensibly about the threat that Islam poses to Europe are actually fascists.

Click here for the stunning piece.

Banksy Does L.A.

Saw the Banksy show "Barely Legal" this weekend. For some reason I spaced and thought the underground, three-day-only warehouse spectacle opened early, so when we showed at 11am on Sunday it was still closed (for another hour yet). We waited patiently in the oppressive heat with a dedicated and growing crowd from all walks of life: the obligatory hipster, wackjob older hippies, parents and kids, business men, poseur blinged-out Persians kids, even Kirsten Dunst.

Really enjoyed it. I definitely don’t agree with all of his politics/ideologies (eg anarchy), but I can appreciate the mode of message. Thought the images hanging in the living room were amazing – you could actually see the brush strokes if you got close enough, which was wild considering that some were incredible knockoffs of famous works. The works of juxtaposition in the backroom were also really good.

I think his works can hit you over the head a little too bluntly at times, which is ironic because I think he does so on purpose in order to hit the lowest common denominator - a practice he blasts repeatedly with his criticisms of mass marketing.

I also think his message of protest misses in effect because he preaches anarchy, but advocates change that can only be brought about through engagement of the political system, not through dismissal.

The guy is a heap of contradictions, but I find his courage inspiring. And he surely is getting his message out there.

Pics of the opening party, and nearly all the works on display.

Fly Veritas

The Economist, with what a truthful in-flight announcement from the crew would actually sound like:

“GOOD morning, ladies and gentlemen. We are delighted to welcome you aboard Veritas Airways, the airline that tells it like it is. Please ensure that your seat belt is fastened, your seat back is upright and your tray-table is stowed. At Veritas Airways, your safety is our first priority. Actually, that is not quite true: if it were, our seats would be rear-facing, like those in military aircraft, since they are safer in the event of an emergency landing. But then hardly anybody would buy our tickets and we would go bust.

The flight attendants are now pointing out the emergency exits. This is the part of the announcement that you might want to pay attention to. So stop your sudoku for a minute and listen: knowing in advance where the exits are makes a dramatic difference to your chances of survival if we have to evacuate the aircraft. Also, please keep your seat belt fastened when seated, even if the seat-belt light is not illuminated. This is to protect you from the risk of clear-air turbulence, a rare but extremely nasty form of disturbance that can cause severe injury. Imagine the heavy food trolleys jumping into the air and bashing into the overhead lockers, and you will have some idea of how nasty it can be. We don't want to scare you. Still, keep that seat belt fastened all the same.

Your life-jacket can be found under your seat, but please do not remove it now. In fact, do not bother to look for it at all. In the event of a landing on water, an unprecedented miracle will have occurred, because in the history of aviation the number of wide-bodied aircraft that have made successful landings on water is zero. This aircraft is equipped with inflatable slides that detach to form life rafts, not that it makes any difference. Please remove high-heeled shoes before using the slides. We might as well add that space helmets and anti-gravity belts should also be removed, since even to mention the use of the slides as rafts is to enter the realm of science fiction.

Please switch off all mobile phones, since they can interfere with the aircraft's navigation systems. At least, that's what you've always been told. The real reason to switch them off is because they interfere with mobile networks on the ground, but somehow that doesn't sound quite so good. On most flights a few mobile phones are left on by mistake, so if they were really dangerous we would not allow them on board at all, if you think about it. We will have to come clean about this next year, when we introduce in-flight calling across the Veritas fleet. At that point the prospect of taking a cut of the sky-high calling charges will miraculously cause our safety concerns about mobile phones to evaporate.

On channel 11 of our in-flight entertainment system you will find a video consisting of abstract imagery and a new-age soundtrack, with a voice-over explaining some exercises you can do to reduce the risk of deep-vein thrombosis. We are aware that this video is tedious, but it is not meant to be fun. It is meant to limit our liability in the event of lawsuits.

Once we have reached cruising altitude you will be offered a light meal and a choice of beverages—a word that sounds so much better than just saying ‘drinks’, don't you think? The purpose of these refreshments is partly to keep you in your seats where you cannot do yourselves or anyone else any harm. Please consume alcohol in moderate quantities so that you become mildly sedated but not rowdy. That said, we can always turn the cabin air-quality down a notch or two to help ensure that you are sufficiently drowsy.

After take-off, the most dangerous part of the flight, the captain will say a few words that will either be so quiet that you will not be able to hear them, or so loud that they could wake the dead. So please sit back, relax and enjoy the flight. We appreciate that you have a choice of airlines and we thank you for choosing Veritas, a member of an incomprehensible alliance of obscure foreign outfits, most of which you have never heard of. Cabin crew, please make sure we have remembered to close the doors. Sorry, I mean: ‘Doors to automatic and cross-check’. Thank you for flying Veritas.”

Success in a Bottle

Just when you thought it was time to grow up and put the bottle down, researchers shine a forgiving light of hope on your dirty habit:

New study reveals that those who enjoy a tipple now and then earn 10 to 14 percent more than teetotalers

NEW YORK (CNNMoney.com) -- If you thought swigging beer or indulging in a glass of chardonnay was putting your career on a fast-track to nowhere, think again.

In fact, a study conducted by two economists and published Thursday by the Reason Foundation and in the latest edition of The Journal of Labor Research, says that drinkers earn 10 to 14 percent more than those who refrain from drinking.

"Instead of earning less money than nondrinkers, drinkers earn more," authors of the study, Bethany Peters and Edward Stringham, wrote. More specifically, the study found that workers who drank in a social setting earned more than those who tipped a glass at home.

The study contends that social capital, which entails everything from a person's charisma to the size of their social network, can be enhanced by drinking.

Those who drink socially, for example, may have an easier time finding a new job if they had made more business contacts, the authors claim, or they might strengthen relationships with co-workers or clients that could ultimately affect their salary.

Keep reading Happy hour for drinkers' wages.

Burger Hijinks

GQ comes at you with the 20 finest burgers in America.

Unfortunately, I can’t say I’ve had many of these. For all I know, Peter Luger’s burger may be freakin’ incredible (I hear his steaks are absolutely top-notch). But I do know that their two picks from the City of Angels leave much to be desired: Houston’s and The Counter.

Neither are anywhere near the top of my list for L.A. - Father’s Office, The Palm, Michel Richard, the Beverly Hills Hotel, even IN-N-OUT have these two beat. And if Burger Hills were still around, the competition would be over.

The Bionic Arm Has Arrived

Four people now have been outfitted with robotic arms attached to nerve tissue and controlled by the brain:

A procedure called "muscle reinnervation," developed by Kuiken and used on five additional patients so far, is the key.

For Sullivan, it involved grafting shoulder nerves, which used to go to his arms, to his pectoral muscle. The grafts receive thought-generated impulses, and the muscle activity is picked up by electrodes. These relay the signals to the arm's computer, which causes motors to move the elbow and hand, mimicking a normal arm.

"The nerves grow into the chest muscles, so when the patient thinks, 'Close hand,' a portion of the chest muscle contracts," according to an institute fact sheet.

Kuiken added: "Basically it is connecting the dots. Finding the nerves. We have to free the nerves and see how far they reach" and connect to muscles.

About three months after the surgery, Sullivan first noticed voluntary twitches in his pectoral muscle when he tried to bend his missing elbow, the institute said. By five months, he could activate four different areas of his major pectoral muscle.

Trying to flex his missing elbow would cause a strong contraction of the muscle area just beneath the clavicle. When he mentally closed his missing hand, a signal could be detected on the pectoral region below the clavicle, and when he tried to open his hand there was a separate signal. Extending his elbow and hand caused a contraction of the lower pectoral muscle.

When Sullivan's chest was touched he "had a sensation of touch to different parts of his hand and arm," the institute said. "The patient had substituted sensation of touch, graded pressure, sharp-dull and thermal sensation."

Sullivan said of the thought-controlled arm: "When I use the new prosthesis I just do things. I don't have to think about it."

The robotic arm does not yet send sensory data back to the brain, but that capability is apparently just around the corner.

Luke would be proud.

Public Service? Nuisance? Art?

Paul Curtis, aka Moose, is a reverse graffiti artist, creating images by cleaning the grime off public surfaces:

The tools are simple: A shoe brush, water and elbow grease, he says.

British authorities aren't sure what to make of the artist who is creating graffiti by cleaning the grime of urban life. The Leeds City Council has been considering what to do with Moose. "I'm waiting for the kind of Monty Python court case where exhibit A is a pot of cleaning fluid and exhibit B is a pair of my old socks," he jokes.

Moose's site.

The NPR interview.

Nora Ephron on the Frustrations of Dining Out

What to Expect When You’re Expecting Dinner

By NORA EPHRON,
Op-Ed Contributor

September 13, 2006
NY Times

WE would like a bottle of Pellegrino. The waiter brings the Pellegrino. There are four of us at the table. The waiter brings glasses for the Pellegrino. The glasses happen to be extremely tall. Tall glasses are not necessarily the best glasses for Pellegrino, but before I can say a word on this profound subject, the waiter pours the Pellegrino into the tall glasses.

When the waiter is done pouring, there’s a tiny amount of Pellegrino left in the bottle. My husband takes a sip of his Pellegrino, and the waiter is back, in a flash, with the last drops of our Pellegrino. He tops off my husband’s drink.

The first bottle of Pellegrino is now gone. We’ve been at the table for exactly three minutes and somehow we’ve managed to empty an entire bottle of Pellegrino.

“Would you like another bottle of Pellegrino?’’ the waiter says.

I haven’t even had any of this one!

I don’t actually say these words.

•

I love salt. I absolutely adore it. Occasionally I eat at a place where (in my opinion) the food doesn’t need more salt, but it’s rare.

Many years ago, they used to put salt and pepper on the table in a restaurant, and here’s how they did it: there was a salt shaker and there was a pepper shaker. The pepper shaker contained ground black pepper, which was outlawed in the 1960’s and replaced by the Permanent Floating Pepper Mill and the Permanent Floating Pepper Mill refrain: “Would you like some fresh ground black pepper on your salad?” I’ve noticed that almost no one wants some fresh ground black pepper on his salad. Why they even bother asking is a mystery to me.

But I wasn’t talking about pepper, I was talking about salt. And as I was saying, there always used to be salt on the table. Now, half the time, there’s none. The reason there’s no salt is that the chef is forcefully trying to convey that the food has already been properly seasoned and therefore doesn’t need more salt. I resent this deeply. I resent that asking for salt makes me seem aggressive toward the chef, when in fact it’s the other way around.

As for the other half of the time — when there is salt on the table — it’s not what I consider salt. It’s what’s known as sea salt. (Sea salt used to be known as kosher salt, but that’s not an upscale enough name for it any more.) Sea salt comes in an itty-bitty dish with an itty-bitty spoon. You always spill it trying to move it from the dish to the food on your plate, but that’s the least of it: it doesn’t really function as salt. It doesn’t dissolve and make your food taste saltier; instead, it sits like little hard pebbles on top of it. Also, it scratches your tongue.

•

“Is everything all right?”

The main course has been served, and the waiter has just asked us this question. I’ve had exactly one bite of my main course, which is just enough for me to remember that, as usual, the main course always disappoints. I am beginning to wonder whether this is a metaphor, and if so, whether it’s worth dwelling on. Now, suddenly the waiter has appeared, pepper mill in one hand, Pellegrino in the other, and interrupted an extremely good story right before the punch line to ask if everything is all right.

The answer is no, it’s not.

Actually the answer is No, it’s not! You ruined the punch line! Go away!

I don’t say this either.

•

We have ordered dessert. They are giving us dessert spoons. Dessert spoons are large, oval-shaped spoons. They are so large that you could go for a swim in them. I’m not one of those people who like to blame the French for things, especially now that the French turned out to be so very very right about Iraq, but there’s no question this trend began in France, where they’ve always had a weakness for dessert spoons.

One of the greatest things about this land of ours, as far as I’m concerned, is that we never fell into the dessert-spoon trap. If you needed a spoon for dessert, you were given a teaspoon. But those days are over, and it’s a shame.

Here’s the thing about dessert — you want it to last. You want to savor it. Dessert is so delicious. It’s so sweet. It’s so bad for you so much of the time. And as with all bad things, you want it to last as long as possible. But you can’t make it last if they give you a great big spoon to eat it with. You’ll gobble up your dessert in two big gulps. Then it will be gone. And the meal will be over.

Why don’t they get this? It’s so obvious. It’s so obvious.

Nora Ephron is the author, most recently, of “I Feel Bad About My Neck: And Other Thoughts About Being a Woman.’’

News Tidbits

• The press is rife with speculation concerning Condi’s love life. Bushie is jealous, no doubt.

• Pope Benedict XVI slams Islam, quoting a 14th-century Byzantine emperor who called the religion “evil and inhuman”.

• Acknowledging higher rates of certain ailments than those seen in veterans of other wars, a study dismisses the notion of one all-encompassing “Gulf War Syndrome”:
  "Veterans of the brief campaign do suffer from an array of very real problems. Yet there is no one complex of symptoms to suggest those veterans, who number almost 30 percent of all those who served, suffered or still suffer from a single identifiable syndrome…"

Spock & Kirk: Closer

MoM: Music of the Moment

On Sept. 19, Darkel releases its first album. Who is Darkel? None other than JB Dunckel, one half of Air, one of my all-time favorite groups. This is his first solo effort.

Dunckel's written and produced some of the finest electronic pop of the past 10 years, and I expect much of the same this go around.

Here’s the first video from the album, for the song “At the End of the Sky”. Surprisingly, it reminds me of certain Smashing Pumpkins – ie Billy Corgan – material, a la "Adore":



You can also check out his MySpace page for other selections from the upcoming album.

NYC: Bush's Cheap Whore?

Moby has some words for the President upon his trip to NYC in memory of the 9/11 attacks:

go home, gw.

Sep 10, 2006 - nyc

dear president bush,
stay out of new york.
you don't like us and we don't like you.
90% of us voted for john kerry in the last election. we don't trust you, and we believe, based on your record, that you've been a terrible president.
you're supposed to come to new york city today.
you're not welcome here.
you only come to new york city when you need to bolster your poll numbers.
you came here after 9-11 even though you ignored warnings of terrorist attacks and cut funding to anti-terrorist programs.
you came here for the rnc convention even though your policies have made america less safe.
you are not welcome in nyc.
go back to texas where you can cut wood for the tv cameras.
or go back to washington d.c where you can watch dick cheney run the country.
you are a liar.
you are inept.
you are probably the worst president that the united states has ever had to endure.
you are not welcome in nyc.
we are not your cheap whore, to use whenever your poll numbers are in the toilet.
we are not your crappy prop, to use when you're worried that you might have to deal with the consequences of your failed policies.
you suck, and we don't want you here.
everything you've done has gone wrong. you are in the pocket of the oil and defense industries, and the poor idiots on the religious right actually sometimes believe that you care about them and their agenda.
you only believe in issues that will keep your corporate backers happy.
you are an awful, inept, corrupt, and tragically incompetent president.
and i'm sorry that you've chosen to come to new york city on 9-11.
we didn't vote for you and we're not in any way happy that you're here.
go home, gw, and let us just get on with living our lives in the city that was attacked
due to your pre 9-11 ineptitude and incomptetence.
-moby

5 Years On: We Remember

Whoa

Sure, these guys have way too much time on their hands, but the geeks who put together this montage of Quake 3 "rocket jumpers" definitely know how to show it off.

With sick moves, deft video editing, and a properly mixed EDM soundtrack, this online vid is in a league of its own.

Those Wacky Asians...

High T3ch Magazine compiled 20 of the best asian-originating commercials found online. Some highlights:

The rest.

If Only Ice Cream Were the Answer

20/20’s two-hour special last week on the seven most likely planet/man killers was scary enough. Now comes word that climate change, placed atop the deadly list by the ABC program, is upon us to such a degree that animal and plant life could face mass migration - and extinction - within the next 100 years:

Global warming taking earth back to dinosaur era

Thu Sep 7, 2006 10:23am ET

By Jeremy Lovell

NORWICH (Reuters) - Global warming over the coming century could mean a return of temperatures last seen in the age of the dinosaur and lead to the extinction of up to half of all species, a scientist said on Thursday.

Not only will carbon dioxide levels be at the highest levels for 24 million years, but global average temperatures will be higher than for up to 10 million years, said Chris Thomas of the University of York.

Between 10 and 99 percent of species will be faced with atmospheric conditions that last existed before they evolved, and as a result from 10-50 percent of them could disappear.

"We may very well already be on the breaking edge of a wave of mass extinctions," Thomas told the annual meeting of the British Association for the Advancement of Science.

Scientists predict average global temperatures will rise by between two and six degrees centigrade by 2100, mainly as a result of the heat-trapping carbon dioxide being pumped into the air from burning fossil fuels for transport and power.

"If the most extreme warming predicted takes place we will be going back to global temperatures not seen since the age of the dinosaur," Thomas said.

"We are starting to put these things into a historical perspective. These are conditions not seen for millions of years, so none of the species will have been subjected to them before," he added.

Thomas said scientific observations had already found that -- as predicted by the climate models -- 80 percent of species had already begun moving their traditional territorial ranges in response to the changing climatic conditions.

"That is an amazingly high correlation. It is a clear signature of climate change," he said.

Not only had the animals, birds and insects started to react, but there was evidence vegetation was also on the move.

For example, climate-triggered fungal pathogen outbreaks had already led to the extinction of more than one percent of the planet's amphibian species, Thomas said.

Not only would some species simply find no suitable space to live anymore, but there would be confrontations with invasive species being forced to move their territory. This would produce not just wipe-outs but species' mixtures never seen before.

And the changes would all happen at a faster rate than ever before in evolution.

"In geological terms 100 years is effectively instantaneous," Thomas noted.

Alarmist, maybe? Scary, absolutely.

O.J. to be Pwned?

Apparently, O.J. Simpson has done a pretty darn good job shielding his assets so they can’t be touched by any claimants, including the family of Ron Goldman. That might change.

Fred Goldman, Ron’s father, is moving to acquire the intellectual property rights to O.J.’s celebrity – he’d own his name, his face, his autograph. Says Karl Manders, the Chicago-based IP consultant who is advising Goldman:

It does strike at the heart of what's important to [O.J.]. Our opinion is: The only thing that's important to Mr. Simpson is Mr. Simpson. …every time he signs his autograph, that name is the property of the Goldmans. The moment it comes off the pen, it's no longer his."

Score one for the smarties.

Paris Punk'd

"Guerilla artist" Banksy has played one helluva prank on Paris Hilton and her fans:

The graffiti/stencil artist has taken 500 Hilton CDs out of shops and replaced them with faux-Hilton CDs containing his own remixes. The doctored CDs look virtually the same as the legitimate ones and still come with the barcode, so people buy them thinking they're normal.

However, once the CD is opened, the buyer sees an inner sleeve with picture of a topless Hilton with a dog's head. Songs on the millionaire socialite's debut album have been replaced by Banksy remakes with titles like "Why Am I Famous?" "What Have I Done?" and "What Am I For?"

Danger Mouse, one half of Gnarls Barkley, is also confirmed as a collaborator, having remixing the songs on the pirated product.

According to the retailers involved, none of the tampered products have yet been returned. Which figures, given that they're apparently being hawked already on eBay for upwards of 85 pounds.

The artwork is hilarious, bested only by the behind-the-scenes video showing how it was pulled off...

“Sticks and Stones…”

If Italian defender/enforcer Materazzi is to be believed, it was the mere mention of Zidane’s sister that sent the Frenchman into the head-flying frenzy that arguably cost the Froggies their World Cup title this summer.

Seems to me that no matter what someone says to you on the field, if his goal is to get under your skin and he succeeds, you lose. I don’t care what was said to Zidane: there’s a ridiculous amount of shit-talking in sports - deal with it!

Damn French never know when to fight and when to fold.

Here’s to a Labor-Free Labor Day Weekend

Wish you all a fine, long, holiday weekend. May you find yourself as chilling as this here panda guy.

MTV WMAs DOA

Maybe I’m just getting old, maybe good taste is no longer a factor in popular culture, but MTV’s Video Music Awards were downright frightening last night. Every single attempted joke flopped, and the music was horrid.

What’s with 95% of the fare being rap/hip-hop, all produced by the same producers and sounding exactly alike? The several rock band given the nod were equally pathetic: Panic! at the Disco - whaa?! These guys get all this good indie blog press? Don’t get it. OK Go performing step for step the treadmill routine we’ve all seen before online? Host Jack Black simply not given any material with which to make people laugh? Sarah Silverman’s dry pan humor thudding left and right? Shakira proving for 5 minutes straight that, no, she really can’t bellydance? The sole moment of sanity was Pink sneering on camera at all before her, then getting on the mic and imitating with disgust Paris Hilton – classic.

If this is what the kids of today are listening to and watching…boy, I must really be getting old.